Wednesday 14 August 2013

The Power of Words

Our usual Weight Watchers leader, Gill, is away for the next 3 weeks, so we have guest leaders for those 3 meetings.  For the first 2 we have Rosemary - I haven't got on so well with her in the past, but I'm getting to like her as time goes on.  Something she said in the meeting this morning triggered something in my mind that I've been meaning to blog about for a while.  In fact I may have even talked about it before, so if this is a repeat waffle, I apologise for that.

Words have power.  Words have a lot of power.  So many phrases and expressions, even the very shortest, have the most enormous power in and of themselves, and are even stronger when you put them into context.  

"It's a girl/boy."
"I'm so sorry."
"I love you." 
"Not guilty."  
"All clear."  
"I do."

Some of them carry joy, some carry heartbreak, and some carry unimaginable relief.  But they all have power over us of one type or another.

Weight loss is an area in which words are enormously significant and powerful when it comes to attitude and state of mind.  What it was that Rosemary said this morning which struck a chord with me was that when she went back to Weight Watchers for the last time before she finally got serious and reached her goal weight, she made a personal decision to not refer to herself as being "on a diet".  Historically, this phrase conjures up all kinds of negative connotations, of being deprived and hungry, of being boring in social situations, and of suffering to achieve what you want.  It's not helpful.  One of our members commented that she has replaced the expression "on a diet" with "on Weight Watchers", because it tends to encourage people to ask about it, rather than automatically making negative assumptions.

Another word, or pair of words, traditionally associated with weight loss and desperately unhelpful are "slimming"/"fattening".  "Slimming" is used both as a verb ("I'm slimming.") and as an adjective ("That dress is very slimming.").  "Fattening" is applied specifically as an adjective for food.

In my usual contrary fashion, I'll tackle the second one first, not least because it's the one that bothers me most.

I have a strong memory of a discussion around the lunch table at work one day a good few years ago in which we were discussing and comparing recipes.  Lasagne came up, and I detailed my recipe for Lasagne, including the fact that I refuse point blank to buy white sauce or a packet mix, and insist on making it myself using the roux method.  An older lady who had been calorie counting for many years gasped in horror.  "But that's FATTENING!"  She was absolutely scandalised.  No amount of pointing out to her that in order to make the required amount of sauce I needed 30g of butter and 30g of flour, which amounted to a total of 7.5g of butter and 7.5g of flour per portion would make any difference.

My colleague's scandalised look and expression have stayed with me, and since that day I have never, ever used the word "fattening" to describe a foodstuff.  It infuriates me when I hear it.  There is no single foodstuff the consumption of which will globally result in people being fat.  It is certainly the case that everybody reacts differently to different foods - an example being that I know a fair few people who have discovered that eating bread can slow down their weight loss - but no one food results globally in a state of being fat for everybody who ever eats it.  

"Slimming" as a word doesn't offend me quite so much.  Used as an adjective to describe clothing, it's absolutely fine.  My only issue with it is that it's very old fashioned when used as a verb to describe the activity of attempting to lose weight, and hence it goes that saying "I'm slimming" tends to carry the same negative connotations as "I'm on a diet".

I'm discovering that one of the most important things in sucessfully losing weight is state of mind.  Clinging on to words and phrases with historically negative connotations does not help.  Far more useful is to find your own definition for what you are doing, why you are doing it and why it is important to you.  Come up with an expression, an explanation which defines your weight loss efforts - your weight loss journey if you like - and which makes you feel strong, positive and confident when you think it, when you say it and when you hear it.

 "I've made a positive choice to change the way I eat and the way I live, to attain and maintain a healthy weight, and to make my body strong, fit and healthy along the way.  I am doing these things for me and me alone."

Trust me, it helps.

Wednesday 7 August 2013

That moment when you get on the scales after your summer holiday...

So I went to weigh in this morning after the better part of 2 weeks since my last class, with my 6 day camping holiday in the middle of that.  It's safe to say that I didn't hold back when it came to food and drink on my holiday, and correspondingly I gained 5lb at the scales this morning.

In times past, a gain of 5lb would have been cause for abject misery, and a trigger for severe depression, very likely culminating in falling off the wagon completely.  In common with many other things about my weight loss journey, this time I'm trying to do this differently.  This time, I weighed in, looked at the number, looked at Karen (the lady who weighed me) and giggled - and she giggled with me.  I thoroughly deserved the gain, I thoroughly enjoyed what I did to get it, and I don't feel remotely bad about it.  5lb will come back off very quickly indeed.

I think this is a key point really, so it bears saying again.  It is not the end of the world if I have a gain, so long as I know why it happened and I had fun doing it!  Needless to say, there are times when I gain and I know why, but I didn't necessarily enjoy it, perhaps for medical reasons or some other good cause - and that's OK too.  It beats the hell out of those weeks where I have a gain for no good reason at all.


Saturday 13 July 2013

It's only a biscuit, how bad can it be?

You just know there's a story coming here, don't you?

After my Body Combat class this morning, my lovely husband took me shopping for some summer clothes (since my wardrobe was a bit light on summer items), and then we went for lunch afterwards in Costa Coffee.  It was nearby, not very busy and heavily air-conditioned.  This afternoon the latter was a prime concern!

Starting today I had a lot of my weekly points still remaining so decided I could push the boat out a little bit.  I chose an iced coffee, a panini and a bag of crisps (26 in total), and then decided that I wanted something sweet.  Checking out the goodies by the till, I spotted something that amused me - giant custard creams/bourbon creams!  They looked to be about 2, maybe 3 times the size of a standard one.  Fair enough, I thought - that's probably somewhere in the region of 6 points.  It's only a biscuit, how bad can it be?

When I got home, I checked it out.  What I had estimated at 6 points, in fact came in at an eye-watering 12 points.   What can I say, you live and learn!

I now have 3 of my weekly points remaining and 3 days to go before weigh in.  So far I have 17 activity points accrued, but as ever I prefer not to use them unless I have to.  Plenty of fruit, salad and good behaviour on the horizon, I think.

Monday 1 July 2013

Damage Limitation

One of the frustrations of attempting to lose weight, however you do it, is that there are times when life gets in the way, and you just can't do anything about it.  As with anything there are coping strategies, and it's down to every individual as to which one you choose.

My preferred strategy is damage limitation.  It walks a line somewhere nicely in the middle of "deprived misery" and "to hell with it".  This weekend was a good example of how I use it.

This weekend I went to stay with my parents overnight.  On Saturday night there was a BBQ at our friends' house.  Knowing that our friends' cooking is absolutely superb and positively irresistible, and knowing that my willpower is weak at the best of times, I was very worried about it.  I sought advice from my Mum and she suggested that advance preparation was the way to go. 

My parents' best friend very kindly took me to Tesco and we laid in supplies - a whole heap of fresh salad including some really nice tomatoes and sweet peppers and some Jersey Royal potatoes, and a load of fresh fruit including all my favourites - pineapple, strawberries, raspberries, melon and grapes.  We went back to my parents' house and constructed a big bowl of salad and a big bowl of fruit salad to take with us.

At the BBQ itself, I started by filling 1/3 of my plate with salad, with low fat salad dressing.  I then added meat and salmon and a very little coleslaw and potato salad, plus some bits of veg.  Absolutely fantastic meal - and having 1/3 of my plate made up of salad and making sure that I ate it in with everything else rather than leaving it until the end meant there was less room for anything else.

Afterwards, with some considerable willpower, I had fruit salad instead of one of the fabulous desserts on offer.  I will confess, although the fruit salad was lovely, it was the only time during the meal that I had any feeling of deprivation.

Before we went out, I'd decided that I would allow myself one "naughty" item - I didn't know what it was going to be, but I wanted to give myself a little bit of latitude.  My naughty item turned out to be an absolutely delicious piece of chocolate-topped shortbread made by our friends' young daughter, which I had with our coffee after the meal.  It was lovely, and worth waiting for.

So - damage limitation.  Top up on "free" items such as fruit and salad so as to limit the amount of other stuff I can eat, but allow myself one "naughty" item of my choice to avoid feeling deprived.  I've done the same thing before, but this is the first time I've really registered what I was doing and written it down - perhaps it will be useful to someone else, I hope so.

Because I didn't count points over the weekend, I have no way of knowing how Wednesday morning is going to go for me.  I have stuck to my points limit like a limpet today and shall do the same again tomorrow - and what will be will be.  But the main thing - the most important thing, I think - is that I'm pleased with how I dealt with what could have been a very difficult situation - with the help of some very sage and welcome advice from my Mum!

Wednesday 26 June 2013

Business as usual

After a long hiatus, I'm back at Weight Watchers.  I've had three good losses in a row (5.5lb in three weeks) and I'm feeling like I'm properly back in the saddle at last.  At the suggestion of the wise and lovely Gladys, I've decided to resurrect this blog - and have also repurposed my Twitter as a tool to help, since I wasn't using it for anything else.

A couple of things have changed since I was last "here".  I've had a problem with my back which has taken a very long time to settle down, and which has stopped me doing my usual gym classes, much to my continuing irritation.  I've never stopped cycling, but in the last few weeks I've been able to up the amount of it I've been doing and have been swimming as well - even adding that much activity has made a real difference and I'm feeling better for it.

The other thing that's changed is that, very sadly, we are now a 2 cat family instead of a 3 cat family.  Squeak, one of our two old ladies, had to be put to sleep a few weeks ago.  We were both devastated, but  had to remember that eventually old age catches up with us all.  She was 18 years old and had a very long and happy life with us.  Nobody can ask for more than that.

So - hopefully I shall manage to think of interesting and inspiring topics to write about and keep the blog going this time.  Watch this space. :)