Wiiiiiiiiiiiiii! (also known as: 'Exercise: Learning to Try')

We've been talking about it for a while, and off the back of a well-timed bonus from my lovely husband's work, we decided to take the plunge.  We are now the proud owners of a Nintendo Wii, complete with Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort and Wii Fit Plus, including the balance board.  (I also acquired the 'Zumba Fitness' game, but I'm quite sure that's going to merit a post all of its own sooner or later...)  Amazingly enough, we've never owned a games console in all our time together, so it's something completely new for us.  I think both of us are gripped by a certain degree of fascination with the thing!

Of course, the main idea is to help us both with our general fitness and weight loss.  It's a type of exercise that means not having to leave the house, that we can do together and which has an in-built monitoring system.  It's cheaper than gym membership too - the cost of it equates to about 4 months of gym membership for us both, and then there are no further costs.  

Being in the position of suffering with a overabundance of different medical conditions, I've found that a standard gym is simply no use to me.  Although time spent using the weights machines in the gym does work my muscles as it's supposed to, it also usually leaves me with crippling fibro pain for several days.  Not constructive.  

I'm of the view that doing gentler, low-impact exercise to tone up is going to be far better for me in the long-term, especially when combined with my usual cycling activities. On the left here is a picture of me with my gorgeous girl, Annie, seen on a grand day out to York.  At the time my parents and I had cycled from Escrick to York - we then had lunch and cycled back, the cycle path is beautiful and it was a lovely day out.  

Anyway - as I can't drive, Annie is my main means of getting around the city.  I go to and from work with her, to and from Weight Watchers with her, and to and from just about anywhere I need to go.  She's a superstar and has a (sometimes mercurial) personality all of her own.  I acquired her last summer through the government's "Cycle to Work" initiative, which means I got her through work and am paying for her through a salary sacrifice scheme - the idea is that I save tax on the cost of the bike and all its accessories so long as I use her to get to and from work.  Quite aside from all this and the health benefits, the freedom that Annie has afforded me has done wonders for my self-esteem.

All this is very interesting, but I'm sure I started this post talking about something else... ah.  Yes.  The Wii!  My lovely husband set it all up last night after dinner, and we immediately started playing with it, setting up the "Mii"s to represent us, playing with the sports, setting up the Wii Fit accounts for each of us.  We were amused and insulted by turns to discover that the balance board goes "Ouch!" when you step on it!  My husband was chuffed to discover that his "Wii Fit Age" was exactly right - I however had no such luck, having to suffer the indignity of being aged up 12 years by a games console... how rude!

Having spent some time on the balance board yesterday evening doing some of the balance activities, I discovered soreness this morning in muscles which I don't think I really knew I had.  This can only be a good sign for how much good it's going to do me!  So far my favourite activity is 'Rhythm Kung Fu' but no doubt that will change. :)

At the moment we're planning to both try to do 30 minutes a day on the fitness activities, plus maybe play some tennis or golf or bowling together if we feel like it.  At the moment I'm optimistic - as the alternative title for this post says, it's all about 'learning to try'.  I'm not sure that learning to try and then keeping on trying isn't half the battle won with some things.  In the past there have been so many things that we've tried with a token effort and given up on in a very short space of time without really trying.  I can't speak for my husband, but for me I think focussing on the need to try and really try properly will help me.

I promise to come back with tales of achievements, aches and pains and comedy moments involving the Wii.  After all, why not share the joy? :)

Prompt!

The annoying thing about blogging is the endless need to think of things to write about in an intelligent and articulate fashion!  So often in the middle of the day I find myself thinking: "that would make an awesome topic for a blog post, I must do that when I get home".  But of course, nine times out of ten, by the time I get home and sit down at the PC the idea has evaporated into the mist.

So - I'm going to do something to try to help myself with this.  For as long as I can remember I've kept a notebook and pen in my handbag - that way I never get caught without a pen and paper when I need one! Invaluable for such things as shopping lists, phone numbers and the like.  I'm going to make use of it for writing down ideas for blog posts as I think of them - prompts if you like.  With any luck, I'll remember what I meant to say, and there will be more posts as a result.  Fingers crossed anyway. :)

First Week Loss

Great result this morning - 4.5 pounds, which I'm really pleased about.  Because I didn't rejoin and start from scratch again this time (I continued my membership from where I left off in October and opted to just put my big girl panties on and deal with it in relation to the large gain last week), it puts my current weight loss at 7lb.  I see this as a really good start, and it's both buoyed me up and reassured me for the future.  I had a delivery from the nice man at Sainsbury's this morning so there's plenty of fresh food in the house, lots of vegetables, soups, fruit, Weight Watchers snacks and that kind of thing.  I'm all keyed up for the week ahead.

Staggering Inspiration

So, while minding my own business on the sofa last night, half watching 'The West Wing' and half doing battle with my latest piece of knitting, I received a text message from the lovely Gladys.  Gladys has her weigh in on a Monday night and always texts me to tell me how she's done.  She's had a bit of a tricky few weeks since the new year and her weight hasn't really shifted in a positive direction - she was starting to think she'd hit a plateau.  Apparently not, since last night she recorded a loss of 6lb!  In my surprise, what I sent in reply was decidedly post-watershed!  I'm so, so proud of her - and of course it provides me with even more inspiration.  I told her at lunchtime that I felt as though I should rub the top of her head for luck before my weigh in tomorrow!

Ah yes, weigh in tomorrow.  Watch this space!  As of this minute, my totals for the week are good.  I've used all of my 49 'weekly' points (but not gone over), today I came in 1 point under my daily allowance for the first time this week, and I've recorded 13 activity points, which I haven't used any of.  So for the week as a whole I am 14 points 'in the black'.  First week back or otherwise, considering the number of weeks in the past where I've finished with my balance in the red, this is a major achievement.

So - until tomorrow.  Wish me luck!

The "I want..." List

I suspect everyone trying to lose weight may have one of these - an "I want..." list. It's a list of things you want to do, to have, to feel - your reasons for losing weight really, any statement which you can start with the words "I want".

Most likely a lot of people have a mental list of one or two things they carry around in their heads the whole time: "I want to be size 10" or "I want to fit back into my pre-pregnancy jeans" or "I want to be able to run up the stairs and not be out of breath" or "I want to get back to the weight I was when I got married" - there are so, so many reasons to lose weight and they are different for everybody. No reason is any more or less valid than any other.

I know that I have many, many good reasons to lose weight - it seems that every single day I think of half a dozen new ones.

I've decided to make an actual list rather than just trying to remember all my reasons - if I have them in one place then I can come back to the list and keep reminding myself of them. As I think of new ones, I'll come back to the list here and update it. Even better would be able to come back to the list and tick things off as I achieve them.

So, here it is:

MY "I WANT..." LIST

1. To buy clothes from any shop on the High Street instead of being limited to places that offer "plus size" ranges.
2. To not be too hot all the time, even in winter.
3. To be able to wear makeup (without it sliding off because I'm sweating).
4. To enjoy the summer instead of dreading the heat.
5. To be able to fit into any item of clothing labelled "one size fits all".
6. To wear a bra which isn't either baggy or cutting in so much that it draws blood/leaves bruises.
7. To have a bath with all of me under the water.
8. To sit with my legs crossed without it hurting.
9. To sit on my husband's lap.
10. To wear a bikini for the first time in my life.
11. To be able to ride a horse again.
12. Clothes shopping to be a pleasure, not an ordeal.
13. To run up the 4 flights of stairs at work, not take the lift instead.
14. To wear high heels without being in agony.
15. To be able to paint my own toenails.
16. To simply not feel uncomfortable in my own skin.

The list is subject to change at no notice, but it's a good start.

"The Curse of Can't Be Arsed"

I'm sure I can't be the only one who suffers from 'The Curse of Can't Be Arsed'.

First thing in the morning: out of bed and into the shower. Out of the shower, breakfast and coffee. Get dressed. Dry my hair? Nope. Can't be arsed. Tie it back instead. Lunchtime at work. Heat up the tin of soup I so carefully went to the effort of getting out of the cupboard this morning? Nope. Can't be arsed. Go across the road to the sandwich shop instead. Home from work. Cook dinner. Clean up after dinner? Nope, can't be arsed. Watch 'The West Wing' on DVD instead (and who wouldn't?).

You get the idea, I'm sure. I'm being flippant and funny about it, but I think it's something that actually warrants looking at in a serious way.

I didn't realise until recently how insidious a thing 'The Curse of Can't Be Arsed' is. Another (and perhaps better) way of expressing it is 'chronic apathy'. It seeps slowly but surely into every aspect of our lives until it becomes a way of thinking - a way of life even. It gets worse and worse until you come to a place where you can't be arsed with even the most basic things, such as looking after yourself and your home, eating properly and engaging in hobbies.

I'm ashamed to admit that this is where I am at the moment. My general attitude is apathetic to the point that were it not for some considerable support (and occasional needling) from my husband, the house wouldn't get cleaned, the laundry would never get done. I don't engage in my hobbies any more because I can't be arsed. I tell myself it's because I have a chronic pain disorder (more on that some other time) and I'm too tired - and indeed sometimes it is that - but more often it's just that I can't be arsed.

It's something I desperately need to get a grip on if I'm really going to make this work this time, if I'm going to change the way I think, change the way the world works around me, and change myself for the better, once and for all.

When I woke up this morning I lay in bed gathering my thoughts for a little while (I usually have a little time to do this in between my husband waking me up and then him subsequently suggesting that I haul my arse out of bed if I don't want to be late for work).

I thought about my new start with Weight Watchers, and just for a moment my brain started down its old familiar path - "I'm really not in the mood for it, I can't be arsed. I'll start tomorrow."

Aha. Gotcha, you little bastard. And so I grabbed the feeling by its metaphorical short-and-curlies and had a full and frank discussion with it in my mind, in the early hours of the morning. We negotiated fast and furiously for occupation rights in my mind, and eventually I won. 'The Curse of Can't Be Arsed' spent its day sitting outside in the cold. And I had a good, positive and on-plan day.

This isn't going to be easy - shaking off many, many years of 'The Curse of Can't Be Arsed' is as difficult as giving up anything else that you've done for years. As with everything else though, it's easier when you're not alone. Who's with me?

Just like starting over

I went back to Weight Watchers this morning for the first time since October, and was surprised to discover that I had only gained 6.5lb since then. Not that it's good in any way to have gained half a stone, but somehow I'd expected it to be much more than that having been away from class for 3 months, with Christmas and New Year in the middle and having been very ill for much of December.

So I'm back again - this time I thought I might try blogging about it in the hope that recording my thoughts and feelings in relation to my food and exercise habits might help a bit.

I have several points of inspiration at the moment. First in this (and in so many ways) is my beloved best friend. To protect her privacy, when I talk about her here (which I'm sure I will, repeatedly) I'll call her Gladys. In the last year, Gladys has gone from a size 20ish to a 14ish through rigorous diet (not Weight Watchers, she's on the other team) and exercise. She's stuck to it like an absolute trojan, through thick and thin and she looks incredible. The difference in her is phenomenal.

My second inspiration was a photograph I encountered the other night. Not a photo of me, but a photo of a lady around the same size and shape as me, wearing only what she came into the world wearing, and doing something that she definitely wouldn't want her mother to catch her doing. (As to where I came across the photo, god bless the internet.) The photo gave me a very unpleasant feeling in the pit of my stomach - if I look like that when engaged in similar activities, it really is time to do something about it.

So - with the unwavering support of my darling husband (again, I'm sure I shall talk about him ceaselessly), Gladys and my other family and friends, here I go again. I'm sure it won't be easy, it never is. But - one day at a time, no guilt and move on.